The Gentleman Downstairs and Other Satanic Parables and Fables

Goat’s Head Soup

Cooks made soup in a large pot in the kitchen.

First, they filled the vessel with water. Then the chef asked each cook to add an item. One cook was asked to add carrots, and another, onions. A third chopped and dropped potatoes into the steaming broth when requested. The chef added herbs and spices.

Then the last cook threw in salt without being asked.

“It’s not ready for salt,” said the chef. “I’ll let you know when to add it.”

“I think it’s ready,” insisted the fourth cook.

“It’s not,” replied the chef.

The chef stirred the pot of boiling soup, trying to dissipate the unwanted salt.

Again, the fourth cook added salt without being asked.

“Well, now it’s ruined,” said one of the cooks, exasperated.

The other cooks tossed the spoiled soup to the dogs behind the kitchen, and then returned to the stove. The chef began with water, and then asked the other cooks for their ingredients. Soon, the broth was bubbling away again. Once he was satisfied, he turned to the last cook.

“We could use some salt now,” the chef asked the fourth cook.

The fourth cook shook his head.

“I don’t have any left,” he said.

 


Inspiration:

“Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.”

The first rule from Anton LaVey’s ‘The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth’ (1967).

– Blanche Barton, The Secret Life of a Satanist, 284.

 

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