The Gentleman Downstairs and Other Satanic Parables and Fables

One for You, One for Me

A woman attended a party at the gentleman’s apartment downstairs. Over dinner, she argued that people’s natural state was selflessness and compassion. The gentleman disagreed. The discussion became heated. So the gentleman proposed a bet: were humans selfless or selfish?

The woman agreed to the bet and to the arrangements that the man proposed.

The gentleman placed three vending machines next to each other on a street corner. The machine looked identical. But they dispensed different items to passersby who deposited a coin. Instructions atop each machine described what the buyer would receive.

The first machine dispensed a gumball when someone inserted a coin into its slot.

The second dispensed a note. It stated that the coin would help children at a nearby orphanage.

The third machine dispensed both the gumball and the note.

The gentleman and his neighbor watched the machines from her apartment porch. The street was busy; many people passing paused at the machines. Some of them deposited coins.

At the end of the morning, the gentleman escorted the lady across the street. They examined the machines to see which was most depleted. Only the third machine needed to be refilled.

The first machine came close to being emptied, to the chagrin of the woman.



“It is unnatural not to have the desire to gain things for yourself.”

LaVey, Anton. The Satanic Bible. New York: Avon Books, 1969. Print.



The Gentleman Downstairs
First Class Travel